Theologian

So... it appears that I am a theologian.

My most recent class is called Systematic Theology. The book for the class looks like three encyclopedias put together in one hardback mega book. My first thought was, "Yikes! I have to read that?!?" Dread filled my mind; I was already taking too long in my classes as it was and I was really hoping that this would be the class that I got through quickly. You know, like you rip off a band-aid. I LOVE reading, but I'm a very slow reader, and boring content would slow anyone down.

I opened up the mega theology book, and began to read the first chapter. Before I knew it, the book had not only drawn me in and got me completely hooked on the "boring content", but it actually defined me right before my eyes. I was absolutely shocked to discover that a big chunk of who I am is considered a theologian in academic and scientific circles - both by the Christian and secular communities. How crazy is that?!?! As I kept reading, the notion slowly dawned on me until I began feeling like the equivalent math nerd who giggled with glee while reading a higher mathematics or scientific textbook.

I suddenly stopped to analyze the situation. Thoughts of the stereotypical theologians filled my mind and I became almost offended with myself. I envisioned old stuffy men from the 1600's or 1700's, who studied the legality of the Bible and reveled in the religion of Christianity, who debated and philosophized over God's Word with other theologians rather than trying to understand it and putting it into actual practice, who wore big long robes, and walked around looking down on the average Christian. I guess I'm describing just slightly more contemporary versions of Pharisees, but that's what I think of. I mentioned to my husband (who was in the room at the time) the fact that I happened to be described as a theologian in the book I was reading, and his response was not one of surprise, but rather a casual concurring, and a hint of wonder at the fact that I was surprised. Hopefully he wasn't thinking what I was thinking of what a stereotypical theologian was.

Never before had I accepted the matter of Church-set creeds or doctines - rather I had always believed that God's Word alone, taught to us by the Holy Spirit, was all the Church needed in written documentation. I still believe this (as in, I still believe that God's Word combined with the Holy Spirit is our Source of Authority on this earth, and that human interpretation only adds or takes away from that Truth), however, it is also a well known fact that God's Word is not written in a clear and orderly fashion, not even chronologically. And for years now, on my own, I have researched and set up by the Holy Spirit's guiding me, a set of topical studies, explainations and amplifications of Biblical teachings, and have restructured Scripture in a written down language that makes God's Word comprehensible to others who would read them. As I thought the matter through, I realized that perhaps what my preconceived ideas of what a theologian really was, may have been only what I've seen in old movies or TV, and I began to remember books that have been written by theologians that have greatly benefitted believers in centuries past and present. People who God had used to re-reveal His Truth throughout the Church age, when much of Truth was hidden. Those people did a great service for the Kingdom of God on this earth, because they searched for the Truth and the understanding of God's Word, and taught it to others, who carried it out in their faith and into the world.

As my mental image was shifting around this concept of what a theologian really is, a few days later, I asked a friend of mine what she thought. She wasn't suprised either. Instead, she reassured me that she didn't see me as a lofty, self-righteous, mental storehouse of Churchianity. But I've always gotten stuck in the assumption that theologians aquire a vast amount of mental knowledge, but their hearts stay cold and they don't live out the life of Christ Jesus that's in their head. Maybe some theologians are like that, but I never want to be like that! When you break it down to: "someone who studies God's Word and learns of Him and from Him in order to grow and teach Him to others", I think of that as just being a Christian, that we all are capable of doing that, and are responsible for doing just that. But I suppose the difference is in the degree to which a person does this. Not everyone is called to the same service or ministry, within the church or out in the world. Not everyone has the time nor passion to research, translate, pray and wait for the Holy Spirit's teaching on each fundamental aspect of Christianity in addition to having the giftings to communicate it to others. Perhaps the closest Biblical term for theologian would be an apostle, and God has already been opening my eyes to my becoming a servant leader in that way for a while now. Maybe this is only confirmation or at least another step towards God molding me into what He needs me to be for Him to use for His purposes and glory! How honored I am to be the lump of clay in His hands!! Lord, help me from being judgmental - let me accept and love all that You accept and love!